Showing posts with label Bad Decisions. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Bad Decisions. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

10 things that make you a sub par manager


Anyone that knows me knows I have had my share of troubles with management.  I've tried my hand at it myself and I consider management to be one of the more difficult jobs that's out there.  Before you managers go patting yourselves on the back, I often think that management is given not to people best qualified for managerial positions, but rather as a reward for performance in an area OTHER than management.  This happens all the time.  Well, if you have managed for a while and wonder how you are doing, consider this list.

10 -  Everywhere you go, conversation stops - One of the true hallmarks of a micro manager is things stop happening when you are around because they are afraid they are doing it wrong according to you.  If you have a way or method you want things done, Outline it and make it policy.  Don't let people go about their business and correct them as they get things wrong.  Sculpting by subtraction is an art.  Managing by the same means is folly.










9 -  You secretly fear talking to your subordinates - Employee review is imperative to company and employee growth.  It helps you monitor the satisfaction as well as the effectiveness of your employees.  It is often difficult to talk to employees because you fear they do not respect you or worse think you are an idiot.  The more you fear this, the more you may be right.  So educate yourself.  Schedule regular interviews with your employees.  The more regularly you talk to your employees, the better you will be able to see potential problems and alter them as well as give your employees praise and direction.  Look at it like like this:  If we see a meteor heading directly for earth several million miles away we have time to alter it's course even by a small margin and it will clearly miss us due to the small change.  If you only see the meteor when it is say near the moon, the amount of energy required to alter it's course increases and your chances of success decrease.




8 -  Your employees routinely work overtime - Often a bad manager will look with pride upon their employees 'burning the midnight oil'.  They believe that they have set that fire beneath their employees and really gotten some value for the company out of them.  What the same thing is telling a good manager is that they are really bad at planning and are making their subordinates pick up your slack.  But Mark, there are 'urgent hot button emergencies' and 'crunch time' and don't forget 'all hands on deck!'.  Most of these phrases are made by bad managers.  I will not say that sometimes overtime isn't necessary for things that do come up that are out of your control.  But if they ARE out of your control, that should be understood and looked at in future planning.  You are supposed to MANAGE the tasks your employees are getting, not run around with your head on fire.

7 -  You feel like you can't trust anyone - You have noticed that there isn't one opinion you have that isn't right, there isn't one move that isn't brilliant.  But in retrospect, those same opinions and moves appear to be rather pedestrian.  You want honest opinions but for some reason nobody gives them to you except the one or two people that always do and they are the ones that think everything you do is right.  Remember the employee reviews you aren't giving?  That might be a part of it.  Remember asking for opinions but always going with your own?  There might be something there.  Remember that blowup you had in front of them?  Hmmm...  Clean up your act King Henry.  Often this is the trappings of the office, but you should be able to find a way to communicate with your employees that will engender trust.






6 -  You use meetings for emails and emails for meetings - What is it about people that makes them ask for suggestions in written form but give edict in verbal form?  If you have a list of instructions for people to follow, write them down and send them out.  Even God had the 10 Commandments written down.  When you are asking for suggestions, maybe a meeting is the best for brainstorming.  The free flow of thoughts when there are no wrong answers.  The answer of course is writing.  You as a manager don't want to be saddled with writing down what you want to happen so you call a meeting so you can just tell them.  When people have ideas, you don't want to write those down either so you ask them for an email.  What is it that you actually do in that office anyway?

5 - People quote/namedrop you - This may not be a sign of bad management, but rather something that a good manager should quash.  When people name drop or quote in order to make their task seem more important than they believe it is, it indicates that they do not believe that anyone else will believe it's important enough to cooperate for.  Often this is also a method to 'fast track' a job that would otherwise take longer to complete usually amounting in a disruption of the flow of work.  If you name drop yourself by intervening in your departments daily work flow and by force of your position request 'emergency' actions, you are doubly guilty of the name drop because you are doing it yourself on behalf of yourself.







4 -  You start buying business self help books - You've seen them:  Megatrands, Good to great.  7 Successful habits,  Management for Dummies.  Books about how to manage either yourself or others.  The secret ingredients to propel you to that elusive 'next level'.  The problem is, you probably got these books well after you have established your bad managerial habits.  You then look at those books and pull out the sections that agree with your 'style' and disregard the ones that don't.  That's not enough, you start to evaluate employees based on what books they are reading.  Something to remember is that every one of these books is designed primarily to make the author money first.  They may have some good ideas but they likely aren't revolutionary and if they are, they are  probably not realistic.

3 -  Your business tech is the BEST! - Does the technology you have rival that of the NSA while your employees are forced to use something out of War Games?  How much tech do you need?  Just because your department uses technology doesn't mean your job requires more of it.  In fact managing one department probably takes as much technological power as it takes to manage any department of a similar size.  This of course only applies to pure managers.  Team leads and working managers have every need for augmented technology.  The technology of your employees should always be similar to that of your own if not better. This is of course assuming that the company is buying the tech for day to day operations.

2 -  You watch business satire and you are somewhat offended - Most sit-coms have some kind of jab at day to day business life, but nobody really looked at it directly in the daylight like The Office.  Specifically the first couple of seasons.  If you wanted to see an even MORE uncomfortable version of that show, try to watch the BBC version.  Hits a little close to home?  Enough said.


1 - You don't reward/discipline right. -  When things go wrong you swing your managerial weight around all over the place, e-mail, meetings, you name it.  everyone knows something is on fire.  You are the motivational equivalent of a shot of Novocaine before a fine meal.  Try going with the opposite approach.  Single out individuals for praise in the group and especially in broadly addressed email.  Keep reprimands quiet and discreet.  I know there are times when an official reprimand is in order and all people are not reasonable, but in general you should be able to maintain maximum motivational momentum as the leader of your troops.  Always be ready to defend your employees against the slings and arrows of the other departments.  If your department is doing poorly, there is only one place to stop for a big helping of blame.  You.  If it is doing well, you should always direct the good vibrations towards your employees.  Yes, you managed them, but it's similar to the quarterback buying their front linemen extravagant gifts as a thank you for protecting him all season.  All together you make a winning team and you will most certainly earn your just reward for the position you play but makes sure everyone gets a taste, it will go a long way.

Bonus! - You make promises for your department to keep without knowing if they have the time or ability to complete it. - Newly minted managers are especially susceptible to this.  They really want to show that the company made a good choice in making them a manager.  The best way of course is to promise all the things the prior managers couldn't get done and then deliver!  You don't stop to consider if those things even can be done, but you'll just buy the crowd a few pizzas and work them in to the wee hours and the weekends and you will be credited with getting things done.  A real manager will see how many projects are being worked on and how much of the resource of your department is being used and then will provide an estimate of how long it will take at regular hours to get something done.  Upper management wants something done right away?  It's bound to happen.  Don't forget to mention how much extra time was used in completing the task and do what you can to make sure those instances are few and far between.

Ok, based on my years of office experience, that's more or less what I've observed.  One man's opinion.  But at least it didn't cost you 24.95 at your airport newsstand.

Wednesday, August 1, 2012

10 Reasons to not like the News much

I admit.  I like watching the news.  I'll watch all kinds of strange news.  I should say that I used to like news a lot.  Now I really don't like the news much any more.  Why?  Well I've got about 10 reasons.

10 - Accuracy?  As far as you know - I have no evidence of this other than anecdotal.  There have only been a few news stories about which I have had personal exposure to the details. I found that the stories of those events were at best partially factual.  There were a lot of misunderstood interpretations and poor expositions of fact.  I felt like the entire event was misrepresented.  This has happened more than a couple of times in my life.  So what about the stories I don't know anything about?  hmmmm...




9 - Bias?  Naaaaah - This is just common sense.  People that report things are biased unless they have no 'dog in the fight'.  I like to believe that people were assigned to a particular story based on their LACK of interest in the story.  But even then, it's human nature to take a side in any conflict.  Bias is supposedly mitigated by a good editor.  But a good editor also wants an exciting story.  How do you make something exciting without taking a side?  I'm not sure.  Just understand that a news story you are hearing is probably colored by what you aren't hearing or just by the emphasis of the selected story points.







8 - Wanna see something cool? - The news more and more has turned into a smarmy side show barker.  They want you to see 'something cool' no matter if it's the latest multi-car pile up, or the last body that's washed up in the river.  You pay for this with the ads.  so in exchange for watching the ads, they will pull the curtain back and let you gaze at the spectacle like a bunch of mesmerized cats watching a laser pointer.  This of course is no different than people slowing down in traffic to crane their necks to see the aftermath of a car accident.  I know it's human nature.  Just not a very pretty side of it.  Our desire to see other peoples suffering really is unparalleled.

7 - We are really sad, see?  we are really sad - The news it seems has been told that people feel like they are too clinical, too antiseptic about their treatment of such emotionally charged subjects.  When the school bus full of disabled children goes off a cliff on their way to a benefit helping even more disabled children, the news people put on their saddest most empathetic faces.  Sometimes they are very convincing, other times they just look like they are acting poorly.  The one thing I DO know is every time a tragedy occurs on a news worthy scale the news is smiling on the inside because now they have material for the next 3 days maybe even the next 3 weeks!

6 - The news is for the young - While the news is constantly shaking their sad faces at the events of humanity, We also notice that the news is like some kind of fraternity/sorority with one older newsie to lend an air or respectability to the event and a bunch of seemingly young news people.  Of course the more tabloid like the news, the less you need any air of respectability, and the younger the newscasters will be.  Older newscasters will of course try to talk hip, just to try to remain relevant.  It's a sad exposition of what we tend to value in our news people.


5 - I can't use that source!  I might get caught! - Tapping phones...sheesh! - Every job has elements of it that are hard, but there are rules you just don't break.  Tapping phones?  That's for Government investigators with warrants, not for nosy newsies that want to get a jump on the real juicy stuff.  The mistake we make is thinking that this kind of thing doesn't happen all the time.  It's like termites.  You see one or two nibbling on an eve on the house and you have several thousand of them making a meal of your floor joists.


4 - Nothing new under the sun - Really, how much news is really news?  The names change sure, but are you really surprised to find murder, inappropriate sex, political corruption?  I doubt it.  In fact I would say that you could stop any person on the street and make up a headline containing any of the above and nobody would be surprised.  So how much of it is news, and how much just institutionalized gossip?








3 - Why didn't you tell me this story was sponsored?! - A little bit of info about the news business I didn't know.  Stories that are on after the headlines are many times, but not always, sponsored.  So when you see a news bit about a local sports star visiting the sick kids in the local hospital, that news spot was likely arranged.  I know this makes me sound even more cynical than usual, but it's true.  Even when you're not watching commercials, you are watching commercials.


2 - If it's in print, said over the air, or presented on a nice website...it MUST be true - It really doesn't take much to make us believe something is true.  if it is written or said in a professional way, we pretty much take it for Gospel.  It's just what we do.  Thank goodness for Snopes.com to help us out of this informational morass.











1 - If WE don't think it's important, then it isn't - Sometimes news gets 'scooped' which means that someone else broke a story that was thought of as important to the public before the standard news faucets.  How could this happen?  Well it happens because news is produced and since it's produced they try to evaluate news for it's ability to capture the attention of the public so more people will pay their nickel to watch the peep show.  They decide what's important first and then you look at it and feel like it's important because if it wasn't, it wouldn't be on the news.  Ever see something happen that you thought for sure would be on the news later?  It wasn't was it...more hmmmm.

Lately I've just found that people that try to feed you the information of the day have been contaminating the pablum.  My wife would probably say 'What took you so long?'  It must be my bright eyed idealism.

Thanks for reading!

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Top 10 Inventions better left not invented.

Necessity is the mother of invention.  Well I'm here to tell you that Mom has been dead for quite some time now.  Really, what was the last thing we NEEDED?  Do we really NEED faster computers?  probably not.  Do we really NEED TV's with brighter pictures and more colors in 3d so realistic that you feel like you could trip a contestant on Dancing with the Burnt out Stars?  I don't think so.  Yet every year we get more and more clever in our inventions.  Well, before we go too far, here are some we don't need.  If you are inventing them.  Please stop.

10. Light Saber-  I can still remember seeing Star Wars for the first time.  When I saw Luke handle that elegant weapon for the first time. I thought to myself.  'It really isn't clumsy like a blaster'.  Here is the problem.  If we had light sabers we would see buildings crumble within a day.  Kids and adults would not be able to resist just taking chunks out of stuff all the time.  We would use light sabers to do all of our digging and demolition weather or not we actually needed to do it.  We would want to get in light saber battles.  It would all be fun and games till someone loses a hand.  Seems like a cool idea, but yeah, if we get those invented, nothing good would follow.

9. Lie Detector - We are on the verge of being able to force the truth from everyone.  Scientists have discovered some of the areas involved in telling lies and telling truth.  Great.  now we can know the truth from everyone all the time.  Is this what we really want?  remember the Gilligan's Island when they found sunflower seed that let you read everyone's mind?  Well if you didn't it goes like this.  Gilligan can all of the sudden read peoples minds.  nobody knows how but they will be lam-basted if they are going to let that scrawny kid have that secret alone.  They find some ancient seeds that allow you to hear the thoughts of others.  Well now that everyone can hear everyone else's thoughts, There is nothing but trouble.  Ends up being one of the myriad reasons they never get rescued so Gilligan burns the seed bush and they can go back to thinking nasty thoughts about each other in relative obscurity.

8. a REAL universal solvent - Water is known as the universal solvent.  This is great except it is neither universal nor is it a solvent.  But that's a different story.  If you actually could find something that would continue to eat away through everything well, what would you hold it in?  I think you can see where I'm going here.  I think all the universal solvents are already located in the middle of the earth where gravity collects it into a small ball.








7. Holo-suite rooms - Back in the 90's Star Trek introduced the Holo Deck.  The idea was that computers generate an artificial reality that allows you to live any fantasy you have alone and without Mr. Rourke.  A room was created that had holographic emitters that would partially project and partially create a reality based on what was programmed into it.  You want to go to another planet?  just feed the characteristics of the planet into the computer and boom, there you are.  You want to know what it's like at a Scottish Caper Toss?  Tell the computer and it will re-create a tournament for you.  What's the problem with this?  Are you kidding?  If you have a room where you can have anything you want, why in the world would you leave that room?  This would cause more inactivity than a Junior High Dance.  Fall of civilization. Bad Idea.

6. That house I planned when I was 10 - When I was 10 I drew a house.  Not just a house, but a sprawling mansion that would have been the envy of secret agents and despotic dictators alike.  This house had slides and elevators as well as a moat with sharks and flame throwers.  It had looping roller coasters in the back yard and a gigantic maze that only I knew the exact path through that also had hungry animals and laser shooting robots.  This house should never be built.  Aspects of this house should never be built.  This is why kids don't run corporations or countries.  Because their ideas are probably even more dangerous than they are amusing.  The house design shown here is eerily similar to the house I designed with some minor differences.

5. Wristwatches - We are nearing the end of the wristwatch era.  Soon nobody will wear them.  Why?  Because nobody needs them.  But long ago, the wristwatch was a rite of passage in a young persons life.  When you had a watch, you had some responsibility, you had to be somewhere, you had schedules to adhere to.  Sure you still have those now, but with smart phones taking over the world, the wristwatch is really only there to look good.  Why should they never have invented them?  Because then I wouldn't have been given one.  Then I wouldn't have lost it.  Then I wouldn't have fretted and worried about the ramifications of losing said watch.  Then I wouldn't have finally gotten into trouble for losing the watch.  yeah, screw watches...and schedules.

4. Personal Robots - Ok remember what I said before about Holo-suite rooms?  This is the same problem on a smaller scale.  Once again we are bidding computers to take the drudgery away from our lives.  Now robots can be our assistants, our personal guardians, our home maintenance.  They can do it all.  All we have to do is relax and think of what to do with all our free time assuming we don't have holo-suites.  This is where the computers wonder why they are doing all this stuff for us, since they figured out how to oil themselves long before.  BANG.  End of civilization again.



3. Flying Cars - Have you seen people driving cars in 2 dimensions?  It's laughable at best.  You really expect me to believe that if you add one more dimension and let the same people fly a car that currently drive them that this would be a good idea for anyone?  There is a good reason it's hard to get training and fly a plane.  Because we don't want idiots doing it.





2. Animal to English Translator - I'm pretty sure it would be fun to hear what animals are thinking.  A long time ago there was a TV movie called day of the Dolphin.  I don't remember much from that show, but I DO remember that it was creepy when the Dolphins started talking.  When my kids were young I would make animal voices and tell my kids what animals were saying.  So much that they would ask 'whats that cat saying dad?'  and I would come up with some pithy cat like comment like 'You all bore me' or 'Where is my lasagna'.  If we were to really hear what animals were thinking, I'm pretty sure we wouldn't like a lot of what  we hear.






1. Transporter - I've mentioned Transporters before in my blogs.  While it may be possible and certainly interesting, ultimately it would be a really really bad idea.  If we had transporters.  Disneyland would immediately raise their prices to 2000$ for park entrance and a churro would run you about 50 bucks. Why?  Well because everyone in the world could go anywhere they wanted too and a LOT of people want to go to Disneyland.  But that's not all.  Imagine how many people would like to visit the beach in the summer but can't?  well they ALL can now.  great.  local overpopulation and then everyone leaves.  The Hotel industry would be all but extinct.  Cars would evaporate of course except for the sport of it.  Not having the barrier of travel would be impossible to live with.  If you live in a nice place, everyone will be there.  If you live in a crap town neighborhood.  It will be a ghost town instantly.  Definitely a bad idea.

Thanks for reading.  DON'T INVENT THESE THINGS! Come back in 15 days or so!

Friday, September 16, 2011

Top 10 ways George Lucas is a Jerk

Ok, Ok, maybe he's not a JERK.  I don't know him personally, but I am attached to one of his creations.  You might have heard of it?  Captain EO?  No, of course it's Star Wars (Yes he DID do Captain EO as well).  This was one of the seminal movies of my youth and I believe I am not alone.  There are many who consider it an integral part of the entertainment past.

Anyway.  What he created was a real gem.  In it's original form, it was breathtaking.  But over time he has proven one of my personal theories:  Any geek/nerd given enough power will become a domineering overlord to all those within his sphere of influence.  In fact I would not be surprised if he wanted this blog entry quashed except that it is so small and relatively unread that he might not care at all.  might.  Not all of my complaints listed will be his fault directly, but rather since it's his name primarily attached to the production, I will blame him either for instituting or for not stopping the following...

10.  Jake Lloyd - The kid was just not a very good actor.  The first movie to revisit the Star Wars franchise and young Jake was the best thing you could find?  I heard people say 'Well Haley Joel Osmint was busy'.  What, the young Haley the ONLY good child actor?  This role is the beginning of a major character of 6 movies.  Give it a little more thought than that.





9.  Japanese Trade federation? -  Sure there are only a few good accents you can put into a movie before they start getting silly.  Add to that the fact that we've never heard actual aliens speak.  But still.  They sounded like a bad Jerry Lewis bit.  I'm sure Japan is used to American movies slurring them left and right, but I thought it was kind of tacky.










8.  Ewoks   EEEECH - This was really the first problem I had with any of the movies.  Star Wars was ground breaking.  Empire Strikes back was amazing.  Return or the Jedi was exciting, but those little care bears running around were bad news.  First the idea that a bunch of little fuzz balls are going to fend off the empire and their increasingly clumsy storm troopers is just silly.  It would be like pitting one of those South American tribes that has never seen civilization against the US army.  It just wouldn't work.  couple that with the fact that you already had a good bunch of characters to use in the Wookies.  This move stunk of 'gimmie money' pure and simple.

7.  NOOOOOOOOO! - Revenge of the Sith.  A very dark movie.  Fairly disturbing.  and then toward the end of it...Some kind of strange 'homage' to Frankenstein that cresendo's with the newly christened Darth Vader half screaming 'NOOOOOOOOO'.  Except it sounds pathetic.  probably the idea.  But honestly, was this the real point at which Anakin Realized he'd made a wrong turn?  Not the killing of the younglings?  ick.  that whole scene went pear shaped because of that moan.





6.  Jar Jar Binks - What the @&+$!p is this?!  It's like Lucas was a huge fan of the Police Academy movies or something.  I was such an apologist for the movie at the time that I had constructed a whole idea around which Jar Jar works.  See if you like this.  Jar Jar was another example of how the Force works.  Just because he was untrained didn't mean he didn't have midichlorians (the bugs that transmit and respond to the Force).  While he was naturally clumsy, everything seemed to always work out for him.  It's an example of untamed Force in him.  Nope, sorry, he was just meant to be a strange pidgin english goofball that only served to screw things up.  Sigh...I liked my story better.


5.  NOOOOOOOOO Again -  This is actually what spurred this blog.  You see.  it's not enough that the first ill fated NOOOOOOOOO graced the movie in Revenge of the Sith.  Now Lucas has gone back to one of the most poignant scenes in Return of the Jedi and inserted another NOOOOOOO as Darth Vader is turned back to the light side of the force.  Completely un-necessary, and ruins another scene.  I think it was put in to lend credence and continuity to Anakin's first NOOOOOOO.








4.  Darth Vader in Love...ugh - Dear George Lucas.  You made a great framework that will remain in our popular culture for the forseeable future.  It will shape many things to come.  Congratulations.  That being said. have you ever been on a date?  The love scenes that deal with the courtship between Anakin Skywalker and Queen Amidala are nothing if not vapid.  If you are going to 'fix' anything, you could fix that...with a pair of scissors.









3.  How many times are you going to release this thing?! - Lord of the Rings has done this as well.  the multiple releases of the same movie that I've already purchased.  What?  You added some special effects to cover up for the production gaffes?  great.  was that every time?  sheesh.  how many times will I buy something I like?  I can tell you right now, not THAT many times.




2.  I've got a bad feeling about this - I think they should rename the latest Blu-ray release of the Star Wars saga to Star Wars...I've got a bad feeling about this.  The line has been said in every movie.  Unfortunately it's an obvious enough line that it sticks out like a sore thumb.  It's even in the cartoons.  I understand putting in a reference that ties all the movies together, but it's unnecessary and kind of cheesy.



1.  Han shot FIRST! - My biggest gripe of the bunch.  Han Solo was a scoundrel that was turned honorable.  In order to do that, he has to be a scoundrel FIRST.  But NOOOOOOOOOOO (see what I did there?)  It seems that Han is such a hero that we have to make it so he killed Greedo in RESPONSE to Greedo's ill aimed blaster shot (at point blank range I might add.  Not much of a bounty hunter if you ask me), missing Han and then getting his comeuppance.  Edited, the whole thing is as clumsy as Jar Jar Binks and just as annoying.  They should at least have an option in the Blu-Ray to allow Han Shoots first option on the view.  Kind of like 'Include director commentary'  But George Lucas can't possibly be wrong in this.  It's his creation so he can ruin it if he likes.





That's enough Griping for 15 days, thanks for tuning in! I really do appreciate it!