10 Things to do or not do after you lose your job.

Well Zippity Doo dah.  It looks like I lost my job today.  I say looks like because it was so quick, I really wasn't sure what happened.  But really that's beside the point.  What's done is done and I must move on.  So now what?  What do I do?  The country appears to have lost it's job today as well (Well the WORKING part of the country, not the SPYING part or the BICKERING part they seem to be just fine).  So I thought I would continue my blog by stating what you do and don't do with the loss of employment.  Please understand that this has more to do with the initial loss and not the chronically unemployed.  Also, as this is kind of a touchy subject, realize that I do not give this advice as anything more than what I would do, I'm not telling you it's what you must do.  I can't afford to take responsibility for what happens in your life.  Use your judgement for crying out loud!  Say, maybe that's why you got let go?...anyway.  Off we go.

10. Don't get mad at the employer - Honestly, these are the guys that paid you to do whatever it was you were doing.  Often the reason you are let go has nothing to do with your performance, but rather the direction of the company. Other times it does have something to do with you.  Don't bother with the fantasy that the company will never be able to get along without you, the BEST of employees are replaceable.  If a company happens to drown after gutting itself, it's very likely that it was going down with or without you and it's better if you're not there for the life vest test.  The best wrench turner in the business will not keep their job in the face of a wrench turning robot.  They won't keep their job if the company no longer needs wrenches turned either.  Sometimes it's just a matter of bad timing.  Anger doesn't really help much.  In fact, I can't think of one instance where anger has helped anyone do anything except appear angry, unless you count hurting peoples feelings, it's pretty good with that.  It's also not bad for getting you into jail.  Also, burning bridges isn't a good idea if they happen to need someone like you later.  Better the devil you know and all that.

9.  Don't call a head hunter right away - The truth is, employment consultants/agencies are kind of ruining the job market for a lot of professionals.  While they don't muck around with entry or low level positions they do insinuate themselves as some kind of professional filter to assist the employer and employee.  The employer pays a pretty penny to the placement agencies for their 'qualified' employees.  These are penny's that they are spending on your behalf that you will never see, why not sell yourself and find a good position that didn't need an agency.  You will be that much more attractive because you aren't costing the company a finders fee.  Wait at least a week before you jump into the placement agency.  Companies, do yourselves a favor and at least look for references from your current employees and friends.  Maybe you can save yourself some money.

8.  Don't cancel your stuff yet - So you've got cable, cell phones, Jelly of the Month club etc.  All of these monthly expenses weigh you down.  You are going to need that money!  Hold your horses there.  You've lost your job, not your skills.  What if you cancel all your stuff and you get a job the next day?  Then what?  I'm not saying go out and spend, but don't go off half cocked and start assuming that this is your financial Armageddon.  It's just more stuff you'll put back into place later that may end up costing you more.  On the other hand, it might be a good time to look at what is really necessary in your life and minimize!  1 month later and you are still not on the good side of the unemployment numbers?  Chop away.

7.  Evaluate why you were let go. - Give yourself an honest appraisal.  Yes, you were let go.  Often an employer will not let you know the reason.  You will not be fired for cause, but you will be laid off' from your position.  This means that you weren't fired, but rather your desk was and you happened to be in it at the time.  Sometimes this is genuine.  If your company is making drastic moves and see's itself in a weak financial position, they will start cutting positions that are seemingly redundant in order to maintain cash flow.  So what made YOU redundant?  Was it your position?  Was it that the jobs you were working on were completed?  Did you work yourself out of a position?  It's not a bad thing to do that.  If the company you are working for just doesn't have anything for you to do anymore, it's best that you move on instead of let your skills get stale.  If you can't get an honest appraisal, find the most brutal person that you can talk to from your ex-job and see if they will tell you the real reason or the scuttlebutt about your disappearance.  You might learn something that you already knew but hoped nobody else did.

6.  Don't get mad at everyone else - This is different than the employer.  Often an employer will let you go with some kind of severance and in exchange for an agreement that you will not to spread venom about that company or it's employees (much less their company secrets!) to the rest of the world.   Well, you are in an emotionally fragile situation weather or not you realize it. You'll probably get mad at several people that had nothing to do with your ouster.  They don't deserve it.  It doesn't help as I mentioned above.  Remember, these are the people that will help you get your next job!

5.  Don't polish your resume (unless you have to) - You should ALWAYS be ready to hand out your resume.  Whenever you accomplish something at work, you should write it down as a note on your current resume to be fleshed out later.  When you do get let go or think you might be, you should already have a ready to go resume that will be polished and impressive.  If you don't, well then you've got time, but what you don't have are the accurate memories to go with it.  It's not a bad idea to keep a work journal that tracks your progress at your current position.  It will help later in making you look as employable and as possible.

4.  Don't make any drastic decisions - Some people when under duress will make sudden decisions that will haunt them later.  You know, like ordering that Franklin mint set of commemorative Star Trek mugs over the next 7 years, or buying a new car because you 'deserve it'.  Anything that seems fairly large scale, let it sit for a few days or even weeks.  Make sure it's what you want to do.  Since losing your job is one of the top 5 traumatic things that will happen during the course of your life, it probably exerts enough bad pressure that your better judgement may be a bit off.

3.  Do Take the day(s) off - Ok, you've been let go.  That's a fact.  Fretting and worrying about it won't help much.  Only doing things about it will.  Sure if there are positions that look like a fit, go ahead and do it, but honestly, submitting resumes doesn't really take THAT much time.  What you probably need is a few days to collect yourself and regroup.  Get objective about things.  Some can do this faster than others.  Take a few days and just relax.  At least they won't have you to kick around anymore. So make the best of it.  If you are lucky, you'll be looking back wishing you had taken some time off before getting back to work.

2.  Do contact your friends - Your friends are your best way to vent and possibly look for other work.  Since most of the friends we make are at the workplace, they will also know what kind of work people we are as well as what manner of job we are looking for.  If they don't have positions where they are, they might know about positions opening up.  Don't be ashamed of your recent loss. It happens to a lot of us.  If it hasn't happened to you, count yourself lucky, not necessarily skilled.


1.  Don't kick yourself around too much. - As an employee you are always going to be available for sudden unemployment for any number of reasons.  The reasons don't matter.  It's just not fun and while part of it is probably your own doing, there is no sense in berating yourself.  Give yourself a day or two to mourn the loss of your job and don't beat yourself up.  You must lose your inner loser and be prepared for the interviews to come.  HINT:  People like and are drawn to confident happy people.  If you aren't one or both of those things, get there.  There is no reason not to be there.  after all, you have friends and they think you are ok, why shouldn't you?  and why shouldn't your future employer.




There it is.  I'm still writing this blog even though I had serious reservations about printing it today.  Well, I'm still publishing it.  yay me. Come on back in a fortnight.  I'm sure I'll have something else to write about.

Top 10 Best ways to earn a living

'Good work if you can get it'.  This phrase has often been uttered by people that have little idea about what they are talking about, but jealousy was rarely a clear thinker.  This is a list of the 10 best jobs you can have based on what I have thought throughout my life.  Understand that there are really probably no great jobs, but there ARE jobs that are better than others and if they are not, they are at least perceived as better than others.


1 - Lottery Winner - Hey Mark, that's not a job.  Oh yeah?  you think so?  If you've got the kind of money that a lottery win will give you it will be a job just to manage it.  You need to fend off wave after wave of people with hat in hand trying to part a fool from his/her money.  Just the charitable requests alone will take days out of the month.  Now what about what you are going to do with your money?  If you don't deal with it wisely, you will soon not have it.  Anyone that has thought about the lottery has thought about what they would do with the money.  I can tell you right now that all of those thoughts likely only have a toothfairy level of realism to them.  Sure you won't have to 'work' in a conventional sense, but you will still have to work to protect your new found wealth.

2 - Professional Gambler - People gamble for fun.  so why not make something that's fun be your job?  I've said it before but it bears repeating.  ANY job made from something you love does NOT mean you never work a day in your life, IT MEANS that you are going to eventually hate things you once loved.  Gambler as a profession has often been examined by movies and TV and it seems the glamorous life.  REAL professional Gambler means only one of two things:  1. Card counting in BlackJack (not easy to keep concentration). 2. Cheater (not easy to keep out of prison).  To accommodate number 1, you need a very good memory and very good concentration.  To accommodate number 2, you need nerves of steel and the ability to leave once you've made your money.  Still it would be so cool to be able to say you are a professional Gambler.

3 - Actor/Actress/Rock Star - Any entertainment professional really.  Admired by so many.  Such a life of luxury!  Everyone knows you and is your friend.  Well, knows you anyway.  From the point you start recognizing that people on TV seem to have easier lives than people in the life you know, it becomes attractive to be an entertainment artist.  Actual performers have all kinds of problems.  First, they must always be on.  If they are in the public eye, their time is not their own.  On top of that, for as many people as love them there will be a small percentage of people that will want the star to die.  What a horrible trade off.  Lots of stars are not rich enough to employ body guards etc, so they are always a little bit nervous.  Just look at the overall mental health of your average or above average star.

4 - Spy - TV and MOVIES tell us that being a spy is actually the mother of all great professions (assuming you want no personal life at all).  You get all the benefits of pro Gambler and Airline industry on top of that you are trained in hand to hand combat and you get to know some of the cool information that you would never know otherwise.  Bad news.  Pretty high stress job.  Lots of risk.  Pay isn't that great.  Unlimited expense account is not true.  Access to beautiful women at exotic locales is actually non existent.  Spys are usually made from boring uninteresting people.  Apparently they draw less attention than the James Bond types.

5 - Theater ticket taker - Sure you have to do all the regular work things, BUT you get to see any movie you like!  That rocks!  This one probably has no down side assuming you realize that you are still going to have to work like clean up after every showing and deal with obnoxious people that try to sneak in all the goodies into the theater in their heavy coat in the middle of summer.  When you are 16 and looking for your first job, this one jumps out as having the glamour of a real job, plus you don't mind your friends seeing you at this job, UNLIKE fast food.

6 - Airline Industry - The benefits of this industry are obvious.  TRAVEL.  Just think, when everyone ELSE is talking about their vacation to the worlds 2nd largest ball of string, YOU are talking about all the exotic destinations as though they are your local walmart.  Make no mistake, those that listen to you are green with envy and wish you ill.  There was a time when this profession was the apex of the working man's good life.  From flight attendant to baggage handler, everyone would get some good flight benefits and the planes had lots of empty seats.  Anymore, there are fewer flights and even fewer empty seats.  The work is much harder and the management/unions have managed to quash any fun from this profession.  But now days it seems that people still regard workers of this industry with some jealousy.  I have some exposure to this particular profession with it's corresponding benefits.  All the work and trouble is still there, but the benefits are shrinking.  Not due to policy changes in regards to the employee, but rather policy changes towards the flights themselves.  Airline benefits are dictated by how many free seats there are in a given plane.  Well there are fewer and fewer planes in the sky with more and more seats taken.  Empty seats are now sold to websites like expedia or hotwire so the airline can make more money.  So now the available seats to benefit the employee are very small per flight and your chances of turning your vacation into a really long layover is much higher now.

7 - Weather Man - Why is this a good job?  I know of no other job where you are required to make estimations and predictions as a condition of your employment, but your accuracy doesn't matter.













8 - Author - The smart persons rock star.  Good authors can be every bit as famous as a Rock Star.  Smart people like to be recognized too, but not for anything as superficial as looking or sounding good.  Creating the timeless novel, now THAT is something to be known for.

9 - Big-Shot Politician - The job of ANY politician is to get themselves elected and then re-elected.  As a result politicians are a mix of spy and rock star.  They are always pressing the flesh in anticipation of the next voter ballot. They spend other peoples money in a lame attempt to keep things stable for their constituency.  The truth is, many kids hear about jobs when they are young and THE job to have is President of the United States.  Naturally, very few of these kids will actually rise to that level of sellout.








10  - Any job in an Amusement park - From the first moment that I was informed that one day I would have to take my place among the ranks of the working public, I would make flash judgments about what jobs were good and what jobs weren't.  Amusement park worker of any sort quickly rose to the top of my 8 year old list.  What's not to like?  You work in an amusement park!  How could this get any better?!?  You can ride all the rides for free and you get to be there all the time!  I suspect that this is one of the reasons that the overall age of amusement park workers is around 18-20.


Yes, there are other jobs that are great.  These were just the first that came to mind.  Thanks for reading...Tell your friends!

Top 10 scheister jobs

Economy's still tough.  We hear that it's getting better.  This is a lot like hearing from your teen aged son that he's getting a D+ up from an F and you say 'Hey! Good Job!'.  The prelude to that story tells itself and it's a sad tale indeed.  So you still don't have work?  Well have you tried just giving up?  While you might need some extra cash, you can try these time honored traditions in separating money from fools.  No, it's not real or honorable work, but think of it as a last resort list.

10. Will Work for food - You hold up a sign that says you will work for food.  Of course you don't really want to WORK and you likely don't care about the FOOD either.  So the translation of this sign should be Will LOITER for MONEY.

9.  Busking - This is an actual bunch of hard work for the money.  It's one step up from begging but twice as hard as actual performing.  You come up with an act of some sort and you keep doing it over and over for whoever will watch.  You provide a hat or a basket or something that people will put money in for their appreciation of the performance.  It is usually with an instrument, but sometimes it's just someone in a goofy costume or a mime or a dancer.  If you do it with a group and you aren't the best one, you won't make much.  If you do it alone, people might not be inclined to give.

8.  3-card monte - sure it's against the law but you are out of work and that should be against the law right?  (don't answer that).  Also known as the shell game, there is a lot of variants but the point is this.  a man throws 3 cards down on the table 2 are aces and one is a queen.  follow the queen as the man throws the cards around.  When he is done, you put your money in front of the card that has the queen.  Then the man turns them over.  if you are in front of the queen, you double your money.  The guy running the scam has an accomplice in the crowd that bets a few times and wins and then goes his way.  The first time he bets small and wins, the second time he bets big and wins big.  If people bet with him, he loses big.  Of course he's in on the game.  If you put your money on the table you will not win.  Don't even try.  If you are on the dealer side of the table, you may win and at least you aren't dealing drugs or any number of things that are more harmful and illegal.

7.  Recycle! - Collect all of those cans and bottles and turn em in!  This only works in some states, but I remember as a kid collecting tin cans and submitting them for some change.  It was my first experience with what you could do to make money.  Wherever you are, the rules are different.  some states don't really have much at all going on for a recycling program, other states have it all.  Way to recycle Michigan.  Your name adorns many cans and bottles.

6.  Am I in the control group? - Sometimes you can submit to medical testing for many different things, drugs or treatments.  You never know what it's going to be on the way in, but you'll make a few dollars or a lot of dollars depending on how rare a condition you have to have to qualify for the test.  It's not like the movies, you won't get super powers, and you probably won't have any problems, but they are running the tests to make sure the treatment is effective and make sure that it doesn't react with different physiologies.  On the other hand, you are a human guinea pig.  That's why you get your greens.




5.  I'm stuck here until I can get this car part - This is a twist on the will work for food.  You walk around in a nice suit and look like a business dude.  You tell your targets that you have no cash and your cards aren't working (Identity theft is a good excuse for this).  Then you tell them the part (usually a 40 dollar part) and indicate that any cash will help.  Sometimes you hold out the 25 or so dollars showing that you have almost made your goal like a mini telethon and their donation could help you reach your goal.  If they buy the part for you, terrific, you can return it to the store later and get the full value.  This is more of a con than a scam, and probably illegal, but it is creative.

4.  I need food for my dog! - I witnessed this one personally.  Another will work for food, but you hold on to a dog you got at the animal shelter and tug at the heartstrings of the passers by.  The dog I saw was named Petey.  Poor Petey. Maybe if the guy didn't get enough money to feed Petey, he'd just eat Petey.  I hope he's doing o.k.

3.  Sure I've got blood, Why? - Donating blood!  A time honored fund raising tradition.  Sure you can donate it, but why when you can get paid for it!  It's the only thing that we can donate that we can get paid for.  Everything else we donate has to be done out of the goodness of our kidneys.  But now If you have a posthumous organ donors card, you can get the organ transfer paid for.  Used to be that if you were a donor, your estate would have to pay for the harvesting of your organs.  But not anymore.  I had a friend that donated blood for money to use gambling.  He won.  What's the lesson there?  Only Gamble with money you  can afford to lose.

2.  Search the lottery garbage - I read about this guy that found a big winner ticket in the garbage bin.  That's amazing to me that you could throw away a winning ticket.  Why bother playing if you aren't even going to check the numbers?! 

1.  Try out for Reality TV - Maybe you are good enough to be famous, or bad enough.  Anyway, some of the ones that are bad get record contracts like that William Hung dude.  Talk about falling into money, and for being more fearless than you are tone deaf.  Amazing.













Hopefully work will find you soon, or perhaps a windfall will come your way.

Top 10 Stupid things said in a job interview

The economy is tough.  No doubt about it.  But the truth is.  Somewhere, everywhere, someone is looking for work in one fashion or another.  In the course of your search for employ you must interview with your potential employer.

The interview is an interesting process. It is the method by which the company reconciles you to your resume.  The fact that they are talking to you at all, says that either your resume is appropriate for the job offered, or you have friends in the company, or both.  When an employer interviews you they are actually looking for a 'good feeling' about you.  Do they feel like you will fit in?  Do they feel like you have the skills necessary?  Do they feel like you are a trouble maker?  The questions they ask will help them determine these things.

The interview conversation should be thought of like a discussion with the police on TV.  The smart person will answer the questions asked and offer nothing more.  The open ended question like 'is there anything you want to ask me?' or 'why are you looking for work?' should be answered with something brief and innocuous.  The following are things that have been heard in job interviews that shouldn't have been.

10.  When is recess? - This actual phrase was said as a joke.  ha, very droll.  Clever quips during the interview process will likely do you more harm than good.  Humor is a very personal thing and everyone has a different sense of it.  Don't jeopardize your potential employment by saying goofy things.  I've made this mistake a few times. 

9.  So how strict are the rules here? - In a different blog I mention the employee handbook as being very important.  It is.  Those are the rules and you should follow them.  Asking about the strictness of the rules tells your employer that you really plan on bending them.   This questions should never be asked because the answer will become self evident.

 8. How many personal/vacation days do I get? - You are looking for a job.  This is your primary objective.  Everyone knows that you need vacation and sick time, but if you open with 'how much time off do you get ?'.  It will put the impression in your employers head that you are really not going to be particularly interested in the actual company you are working for.  The time to ask about the vacation arrangements is when they offer you a position.  If it hasn't come up by then, it's time not only to see how much vacation time there is, but it is also time to negotiate your time off.  I always ask for an extra 5 days of sick/personal time.  It's easy to get because sick days are not reimbursed so if 'things don't work out' they don't have to pay you for those days.

7. Boy will I be glad to get away from my old job - Don't bad mouth your old employer until after you've got the job.  even then, it's not a really good idea.  you never know who has political ties to other businesses in the area.  Your future boss's wife might be the one you had the biggest problems with at your prior job.  Who knows?  Even when you are employed, it's best to let bygones be bygones.  I've had problems with this one as well because people like to talk about their prior battle wounds.

6. What's your sick policy like? - This falls under the personal days but it's a bit different.  You are asking what the policy is.  Whenever someone asks for chapter and verse on a companies disposition towards anything specific, it tells the employer that you are probably going to try to find the loophole so you can ultimately take advantage.  Don't do it.  Don't GAME the system.  It will put you in bad with your managers as well as you co-workers.  It will NOT make you Ferris.

5. Can I get paid in cash? - If you are an illegal alien.  This might be important for you.  It's also important for your employer to know.  Also, trying to avoid tax garnishments or alimony obligations are not looked on favorably.  Just assume that you will need to have a bank so you can be paid in the same way that everyone else is.

4. I have a side business, but it shouldn't interfere - If they ask you about other concerns, then go ahead and mention that you have a side thing selling khaki beany babies on Ebay.  Otherwise, keep that information to yourself.  It will taint their view of you and it's really not their business.  On the other hand, you should understand that this is to be your primary method of employment and will supersede any other interests you may have in the event of a conflict.

3. My goals?  Well I see myself with your job. - Looking overly ambitious only works with managers not directly involved in managing you.  Your direct manager really doesn't want to hire someone that is gunning for his job unless he is ambitious as well and will need an heir to his position.  This is nearly impossible to ascertain during the interview process so it's best to not show off any great ambitions.  A good answer to the really silly question of 'where do you see yourself in 5 years' might be 'In 5 years I would hope to have expanded my skill-set such that I can take advantage of the best opportunities available'

2. I can whip em into shape - Don't pretend to be the great reformer unless they are asking you to do so.  If a job wants you to 'whip a department into shape'  That actually tells you more than they want you to know.  It tells you that they have been unable to do this themselves and they have unruly employees.  Ultimately you are dealing with a company that has management problems.  If you take this position, you will be fighting with management.  If you offer the above unsolicited, you are telling them that their management is probably ineffective.  Nobody wants to hear that.

1. What was the question? - For goodness sake, PAY ATTENTION.  Nothing is worse in an interview than looking disinterested or bored.  You need to be on the edge of your chair and interested in everything that is being said.  If you are off in your own world during an interview, you might as well kiss that potential job goodbye right there.











If you are looking for work, I hope you find employment soon.  I think that we will be swinging back on the jobs front, but not as quickly and likely not the way we were used to before.  Quality people are always in demand, so put your best foot forward and go get em!

Top 10 Careers I would have if I didn't have this one.

Don't get me wrong.  I love my job.  really I do.  It's just the right amount of challenge, stress and camaraderie that is what you want in a career.  But as good as your job is, don't you look back on your life and wonder...what if I had become a _________?

When my job gets tough, I certainly do think about the other careers that I wanted to get into instead of the one that chose me.  Of course there are many jobs that I thought about as a kid that I come back to in times of stress.  Without further ado, here they are.

10.  Writer - There are a lot of people that think about writing.  I must since I write this blog twice a month.  The truth is, in order to be a successful writer, you probably need to have a story to tell.  Ok, I have that.  You also need a bunch of time set aside to write said story.  Ok, I suppose I could scrape that together.  Finally, you need to have the discipline to actually write the book.  That's where I fall down.  You see, I have a couple of good story lines for books, but I just don't have the gumption to actually put pen to paper.  At this point, the only reason I would write them is for me, but at least that's something.  Also,  After sampling what passes for comedy on most of the tv stations, I've decided that I could do that well.  Of course it's easy to armchair quarterback something like a sitcom, but really some of the crap that passes for comedy these days, it's surprising we aren't all watching the test signal.

9.  Vocal Talent - Much of the money without the annoying paparazzi and all I'd have to do is talk?  wow, that sounds great.  Actually I do it now.  The problem is, the money and the consistency of work.  You see, I've found that I've grown accustomed to a regular check and as such I would not be able to sustain the life of vocal talent.  The problem is, there is no shortage of people that can read and of those people many of them have fairly pleasing voices.  This makes the supply MUCH larger than the demand and as a result, it's hard to find enough work so that you would want to actually transform it into a career.








8.  Ride operator at an amusement park - I think this one is more the job I wanted when I was 16 or so. This doesn't sound glamorous and I know I would probably get tired of it quickly, but I would love to work at Disney or the like.  'Please keep your hands and feet inside the ride at all times, have a good trip!' It would seem to loose it's magic after about the 500'th time or so, but I feel I could make a go of it.  Plus I might get to do the Jungle Cruise.  That is an awesome ride for the cast member!  You get to have a captive audience for 5 minutes and they really want to find you amusing.  How could it get any better?!  The down side is I probably would end up working at Lagoon.  ick.  I would rather be a state fair fried butter vendor. 

7.  Casino Dealer - Just for once, I'd like to be on the winning side of the cards.  At least if I'm losing, I'll get tipped! Imagine, you get to play a game for several hours and then you go home.  Some people get obnoxious with you, that's ok, thats what the security folks are for.  Other people try to get on your 'good side' like it mattered.  So you commiserate with the losers, congratulate the winners and keep your hands per hour number humming.

6. Candy Store owner - I would really like to own a candy store.  I like being the boss, I like candy.  How could I go wrong?  For some time I did run a candy store that consisted of a rickety cart that I loaded with different candies etc.  It used the honor system and it annoyed my co-workers, but It was cool to have and I really liked running it.  I got very good at figuring out what candy would sell and why. I don't do it anymore, but it really seems like an easy way to make money.  Location is of course the secret there.

5.  Psychic - I do this on an amateur basis, I don't believe in it, but it comes fairly easily to me.   I won't give away all the secrets but suffice it to say, people can't see into the future etc.  It's fun to do anyway though.  You get to tell people what they would like to hear and seem really mystic and stuff.  For what they accomplish, your standard psychic makes amazingly good money.  You want to have a load of fun at your next party, hire a psychic, It will be memorable. 

4.  Independent wealth - Ok I know this isn't a job, but I feel like I would really be good at being rich.  Well, actually, not really.  If I were really rich, I would very likely blow my money in some very bad directions.  Maybe it's best I'm not rich.  Rats, I just looked at my salary v.s. the world population and I AM rich.  It's not nearly as great as I thought.

3.  Entourage Hanger on - You know these guys.  They are the friends of people that have real talent that ride on their coat tails.  They have no real ambition or talent themselves other than to grease up the real guy making the money.  They hang around and get dry-cleaning and maybe play some video games or tell people they know the famous person they are hanging around with.  Pretty sweet gig.  Till the well runs dry that is.  I guess you have to know someone famous first.  I saw Charlotte Rae in an airport on my way to a flight, does that count?  She didn't think so either.

2.  Secret Agent - Bond...James Bond.  I would LOVE to be a secret agent.  Not the real kind that get deported or killed, but more like the James Bond kind that can drive any vehicle known to man.  Is as obvious as a Neon sign, and can make any bet in the Casino and it always comes up good for him.  Who wouldn't want that job?  I've heard that actual jobs in the CIA or Military Intelligence actually takes a LOT of disappointing desk work as well as some very unglamorous reporting and meetings o pleanty as well.  Sheesh, I can already get that in my current job.

1.  Radio Personality - Once again, a job that I have some familiarity with and one that pays far to little to be practical.  But it would be fun to just yammer on about what I'm thinking about to all my listeners.  As soon as I got tired of talking, I could play some more music.  Once again, this job has some problems because it's not nearly as fun is it used to be say 30 years ago or so.  Now days, it seems you say anything as a personality and your as likely to get fired just because it offended someone.







Well, these are the other jobs I probably won't have any time in the near future, but a guy can always dream, can't he?